Unfinished but Still Loved

Because finishing isn't the only measure of making.

A love letter to unfinished gems everywhere

We have all been there, the new project! It’s a heady feeling when you gather all you need to start on something new and you’re off.  But then the initial excitement wears off. Maybe it’s harder than you expected, taking longer than you imagined and have time for, you didn’t have all the supplies you needed, it’s just not working out or, another “better” project is calling your name.  Whatever the reason, progress stops and eventually it gets put away, another half-finished project, destined to live on only as a reminder that you didn’t follow through.

But I get it, unfinished projects feel like failure, and each one doubles down on the narrative that as a creative you are wayward and unable to finish anything. The problem is we’re conditioned that we need to finish things, that quitting is bad.

There is a reason why we find leaving projects hard.  We have invested time, effort, enthusiasm and money into the project that you can’t stop now. 

This is further reinforced by the message we hear time and again: that persistence is admirable, and that the toughest individuals are those who put their heads down and get on with the job.

This is a sunk cost fallacy. 

You’ve invested too much to give up now.  But the time and money have already gone. Finishing doesn't magically get them back.  The question isn’t have I invested too much to quit, but do I want to invest anymore?  So, what else is there? 

You need to be able to come to terms with leaving projects that aren’t working, whatever the reason, without feeling guilty.  After all, this is something that we love, it shouldn’t make us feel guilty. Strategic quitting, if you will. This isn’t “give up when things get difficult”, it’s recognising that persistence is valuable when the thing you are pursuing is still worth pursuing. Persistence for its own sake isn’t a virtue.

Sometimes the brave thing is to keep going.

Sometimes the brave thing is to put it in a drawer and walk away.

And crucially, neither decision tells you whether the creative work was worthwhile.

I am reminded of when I first learnt to knit and again when I learnt to crochet.  What do you do – you knit little squares in the basic stitches, practising until you have a nice, neat piece, then you move onto something more complex.  In fact, even now I will knit the test square to make sure that the yarn I have and the tension I knit will give the desired result and if necessary, I can make adjustments before I start.  In the same vein, I think of these unfinished projects as “test squares”, part of the learning process before I move onto the end project. 

I am a polycraftal person and much like a magpie I am easily distracted by the next shiny thing.  

In the last few weeks, I realised that while I have been really creative in a great many ways, I have not given painting the time it needs and in fact I haven’t finished a painting in over a year.  In an attempt to get me out of my painting slump and none of the unfinished projects resonating, I dug out from the back of the cupboard an old, covid purchased, paint by number kit.  The paints had all dried up, so this wasn’t going to be the easy project to complete I imagined, but I got stuck in.  Guess what, yup, it’s unfinished.

But these projects deserve our love, they deserve to be celebrated for the progress that was made and the lessons learned. 

Now, here’s my point, do I mind, no not really, I am not going to beat myself up over it, knowing what I have spent my time on in recent weeks and months.  I still look back on the time I spent getting this far with affection, because it was just what I needed.

For me I needed a reminder, that I enjoy the slow craft of painting.  You can’t rush; painting needs to be slow and controlled.  Mixing colours and adding paint, allowing it to dry before you add more to build up the image is a form of meditation. It absorbs your attention, and for me, takes me back to a time when as a child I would sit pulling faces as I concentrate.  That is where I found my joy for a few hours

Whether you push on to completion, or whether you allow the project back into storage, only you will know if it’s the right decision.  But I know that if you keep joy and curiosity at the centre of your decision then you will make the right one.

Love it enough to finish it. Or love it enough to let it go.

I currently have two crochet projects on the go, four or five paintings that need completing, the materials for several sewing projects out on the table waiting to get started.

I have the scrapbook of this summer with all the photos printed and the paint pens ready to decorate the page all together waiting to be started and finished before I can move into autumn, when my Christmas cards and decorations will start queuing for my time. 

I have one novel half written and another that needs a complete re-write and the constant demand for content and blogs for the Long Table never far from my mind.

And that’s just the things I can think of as I sit here and write. 

Do I feel guilty?

Nope!

Will I get back to them all, most definitely not, but you know, maybe you will see a few of them in the upcoming months, finished and proud, but I know I won’t stop loving all the ideas I have had, started and not quite made it to the finish – because if I have said it once I will say it 100 times, the joy is in the journey not the destination.

P.S   Hmmm that has given me an idea. Maybe we need to have a swap shop – where we swap one unfinished project for someone else’s because maybe what these little things need is more love and attention.